Teaching Immorality In Schools

By Ugochukwu Ejinkeonye

If anyone had told me a few years ago that a time will come in Nigeria when the authorities will approve the teaching of sexual immorality as a subject in junior and secondary schools, I would have thought that the person had lost his mind. But now, before our very eyes, it is happening, and I lack words to describe the shock among many Nigerians! 

*Ugochukwu Ejinkeonye

Not too long ago, I was shown the topics being treated under the subject called “Sexuality Education” or “Sex Education” which tender kids in both junior and secondary schools in Nigeria are now being forced to learn.  Mere kids, some as young as ten or even nine, are put in the hands of teachers, who deploy every energy, talent and creativity to saturate their tender minds with every detail about sexual immorality and the use of contraceptives. 

When I first raised alarm on this issue in my weekly column not too long ago, a concerned parent wrote me to say that the ‘Teacher’s Guide’ given to the Integrated Science teachers (who handle this subject) mandates them “to teach the children that religious teachings on issues like pre-marital sex, contraception, homosexuality, abortion and gender relations are mere opinions and myths! They are also to teach the students how to masturbate and use chemical contraceptives (designed for women in their 30s). The ‘Teachers Guide’ equally lays a big emphasis on values clarification; this empowers teenage children to decide which moral values to choose since the ones parents teach them at home are mere options.”

It is difficult to imagine that anyone outside a mental home could have the mind to design such a subject even for the children of his worst enemy! In my view, this clearly qualifies as child abuse, which, sadly, has been endorsed by the authorities.  I have reasons to suspect that what some of the teachers would be giving out would be targeted more at titillating their tender victims than educating them!  I can imagine how easy it would now become for a teacher who has been targeting a female student to use his creative elaboration of this subject, to get the girl so overwhelmed she would become easy meat.

I am told that there are two main reasons for the introduction of this subject in our schools. One is to empower school children with adequate knowledge about their bodies and how to “safely” indulge in pre-marital sex without falling victims to teenage pregnancy and sexually transmitted diseases, especially HIV/AIDS. The second reason is to demystify fornication, give it a positive image, as something to be cherished and enjoyed without any fear, as long as it is done “safely” and consensually. The belief is that with the age-long “superstition” built around sexual immorality which ‘stigmatizes’ it as an evil and sinful activity, some kids tend to go into it with fear and dread, and so develop psychological problems arising from the guilt they feel afterwards. 

But these reasons are simply hollow and unconvincing. They are built on the assumption that in the present age, it is extremely difficult, if not impossible, for unmarried people to abstain from pre-marital sex.  Instead of emboldening kids to behave like dogs, why not teach them to value their bodies and maintain their self-esteem by abstaining from immorality as our own parents had taught us? The difference between human beings and animals is the ability to reason and determine the consequences of actions, and then exercise discretion and self-control. Why not tell a kid the consequences of an action and use that to dissuade him from indulging in it?

Looking at the earnestness with which this policy is being pursued despite oppositions to it, one is forced to suspect that there may also be a commercial angle to it. Are we sure that substantial profit is not   accruing to the initiators of this programme and their collaborators in government from the sales of the several books being written and printed on the subject? Support may equally be coming from the manufacturers of contraceptives who certainly see in this a lucrative venture to promote and sustain.

Now, how far has this subject helped in reducing teenage pregnancies and STDs in the Western nations where it has been taught, assimilated and practiced for many years now? It is a fact that these teachings have, for instance, been introduced in both the United States and Britain for many years now, but as I write now, I have before me, a BBC report saying that Britain has the highest record of teenage pregnancy in the whole of Western Europe. Also, another report has it that the United States has the highest number of teenage pregnancies in the entire Western world. Again, in the United States, it is reported that new infections of HIV are still on the increase.

That naturally leads us to the contentious issue of “safe sex.”  So, what is all this fetish about “safe sex” and how “safe” can sex actually be?  The truth is that a lot of studies and findings have effectively punctured the dubious confidence built over the years on condom-use.  We know that with an effective magnifying lens, it is easy to see that several objects, especially rubber and plastics, have tiny holes through which very minute micro organisms could pass. I read somewhere recently that “HIV virus is only 0.1 micron in size while the naturally occurring holes in a latex condom is of the order 5 to 50 microns in diameter.”  So where then is the “protection” we have heard so much about if the deadly virus can indeed pass through the wall of  a condom? Is this not why we have often heard reports of people contracting HIV even though they had practiced the so-called “protected sex”? This is the time to rethink all this stuff behind which some fellows have hidden to pollute the minds of kids with ruinous teachings.

Fortunately, we have one precaution that does not fail. And that is the good old abstinence, which has been proven and tested to be the only reliable protection against deadly STDs and teenage pregnancies? We must hasten to realize that what is at stake here is human life, and should not be toyed with, for whatever reasons. It is becoming increasingly difficult to understand this desperation to create an immoral and ungodly society by misleading the youths?  Now, if not for reasons that are less than noble and wholesome, why would Nigeria be eager to import a policy that is failing even in more advanced nations?   

Okay, here is another point to ponder: HIV is 500 times smaller than spermatozoa, yet research has established that spermatozoa are able to sometimes pass through the wall of a latex condom to cause conception. Now, if this is the case, are we not by this subject leading our youths through the minefield? The example cited earlier of the worrisome rise in fresh infections of HIV in a place like the US  where years of successful sex-education has achieved overwhelming attitudinal change in favour of condom-use should serve to buttress this point.

Now, with this policy in place and flourishing, where is this nation really heading to? What is the use living, if one must live like a dog? 

I would, therefore, want to advise the  school boy or girl reading this piece to please pause awhile and ask himself or herself what the initiators of this policy hope to achieve in his of her life by giving him or her these teachings? Such a youth should wonder how they still expect him to concentrate on his studies after they have saturated his mind with filthy teachings that only fill his mind with distractive lusts. Now, if his instructors (who are mostly parents) are encouraging him to freely indulge in sexual immorality at this early stage of his life, what type of future leader do they expect him to become? After “empowering” him to go on the rampage, wouldn’t they have succeeded in giving him a disease deadlier than even the AIDS they are presuming to save him from – which is the destruction of his moral fibre?  What is the guarantee that he would be able to build a healthy family afterwards, by shunning the promiscuity that this subject is surely preparing him for, and which, as we all know, results in the proliferation of broken homes which has become the nightmare of the Western world?   

It is instructive that The Guardian on Sunday, July 18, 1999, carried a report that a cross section of American college (mostly female) students are regretting the limitless freedom their parents had allowed them and have resolved to devote themselves to pursue a “no-sex” campaign. But in Nigeria in 2013, sexual immorality has been deregulated and democratized.

Right now, there appears to be some serious regret soaking the consciousness of many in the Western world, because of the moral wreck many children have become. But they are now helpless, because, it seems to have become too late, and things have gone out of hand. They now wish they never gave a perverted interpretation to freedom at some point in their history. 

But poor Nigerians, we are always distinguished by our peculiar eagerness to always gobble up everything Western, no matter how rotten or destructive. Go to the people in Nollywood, and ask them why they are going so wild and immoral and the answer you will get is: That is how they do it in Hollywood. See what I mean?

But concerned Nigerian parents cannot afford to be intimidated and just watch helplessly as some fellows whose intentions are less than noble go all out to ruin their kids for them. And so, they should be able to ask: To what extent should the government interfere in people’s lives and families? Where does the government derive the authority to invade somebody’s home with ungodly teachings and inflict them on the person’s kids, just because he gave his kid to the government to educate in their schools? Shouldn’t an open and clear expression of disaffection towards this gross violation by stakeholders lead to its reappraisal and possible removal from the school curriculum? 

Again, and very importantly too; most people have strongly accepted and hold very dear to their hearts the teachings they have received from the religious faith of their choice (which we as civilized people must respect) that sexual immorality which is a grievous sin against God attracts eternal damnation; and they are eager to ensure that both themselves and their kids escape this terrible doom; how then can we accommodate and respect this their belief (which is sacred to them) in this current effort to teach and encourage their children to freely indulge in fornication?  Should we just dismiss and callously tear down a belief they hold so sacred and dear, and with which they have determined to successfully raise their children to become morally healthy kids? As if it does not matter?  

It is time to rethink this policy and remove it from the school curriculum since it denies a large a number of people the option of choice. Many parents are not even aware that such a teaching is being generously forced down the throats of their precious children, thereby destroying all they have taught them at home.

Certainly, there are centres where some NGOs have established to propagate these pro-pre-marital sex teachings. Interested parents can take their children to those centres, while the objecting parents are spared the trauma of watching their kids being subjected to a menu they firmly believe is terribly unhealthy and ruinous. Their right to dissent must be respected.   

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May 2013

Tribute To Chinua Achebe (Ikejimba; 1930-2013)

By Chike Momah 

[This tribute is a second revision of a piece (REFLECTIONS ON CHINUA ACHEBE) which I wrote in 2000, and revised in 2007. His passing, in the third week of March 2013, has necessitated this revision.]     

Chinua Achebe was a compelling figure, straight out of a Biblical saga. He was also, rather more prosaically, a friend who was so close, he was like a brother. A few hours after his death was blazed around the world, I received a condolence call from a member of our Dallas, TX Igbo community. This friend asked me if I was sure Chinua and I did not share an umbilical cord. Another person, this time a Reverend gentleman, expressed his condolences in rather more risqué language. “Your friendship with Chinua,” he said, “reminds me of the biblical story of David and Jonathan.”

I would be lying through my teeth if I said I was not flattered by the language in which the two condolences were couched. But while I gloried in the way my friendship with Chinua was perceived by these two gentlemen, two things struck me about the manner their perceptions were expressed. The reference to Chinua and I sharing an umbilical cord will be easily recognized for what it was: a humorous turn of phrase. But when the clergyman reached for his Bible in search of relational equivalences, he lighted on one of the most emotional passages in Holy Scripture: David lamenting the death of Jonathan, whose love for him, David sang, “was wonderful, passing the love of women!” The love of women? I ask you! 
   
The clergyman’s Biblically inspired phraseology also set me thinking in an unusual direction. I thought about it for a long while, and then – eureka! – it hit me. Chinua Achebe’s story, the saga of his life, is a story of almost Biblical proportions. He rose so far above his humble birth, and above his innate humility – as a human being, a classmate in school, and a friend – that nothing about him seemed ordinary. And, amazingly, his stratospheric rise to greatness, fame and universal acclaim was, at least, twice predicted: first, in 1943, by his and my primary school Headmaster, Mr. Okongwu, as sagacious an observer of humanity as you are likely to meet; and, about a dozen years later, by Chinua himself, albeit innocently. 

Chinua did not prophesy, in so many words, that he would, one day, be a great man. But, about two years BEFORE he even began to write his epochal novel (THINGS FALL APART; published in 1958), he wrote the following words to a mutual friend: “Yes, there may be many stars in the firmament, but some shine brighter than others.” My memory, at my fairly advanced age, is like a sieve but, as near as I can remember, those were his exact words. I know this because I saw and read the letter he wrote to the friend, and I was involved in the sequence of events that led to that innocent prediction. The mutual friend, I am happy to relate, also achieved considerable success, in his own right, as a novelist. Glory be! 

Headmaster Okongwu’s prophecy was couched in more straightforward and unambiguous language. In 1943, as I was sweating over my preparations for the entrance examination to Government College, Umuahia (G.C.U. – a boys’ high school), along came my Headmaster. He regarded me for a moment or two, and then uttered his immortal words: “If,” he said, “you do well enough in the exam to gain admission to the school, I predict you will there meet a boy called Albert Achebe, and Albert will make the rain that will drench you!!!!!!” (This was a boy he last saw in 1940, when Chinua was ten years old.) In the upshot, I gained admission to GCU. Chinua also did, on a merit scholarship! This was in January 1944.

 The rest is history. In the middle of 1944, our first year in high school, Chinua was promoted, with five other boys, to class two. First drenching! From then till his high school graduation in 1948, he was the best student in his new class. That same year, he won a merit scholarship (one of only six or seven awarded that year) to the University College, Ibadan (U.C.I.). To study MEDICINE!! U.C.I. was then the only institution for tertiary education in the country. He changed courses at the end of his freshman year, and I caught up with him one more time. This was in 1949. We both graduated, Bachelor of Arts, in the same subjects, in 1953. Throughout those four years, our professors and lecturers, again and again, let us know that Chinua was, not only the best student in the class, but also the best writer of English. He achieved the best result in our degree examination. Second drenching!! 

I need not belabor the point. More drenching followed, fast and furious! Within five years of our graduation, Chinua published THINGS FALL APART. Other novels followed, and success followed hard on success. The inevitable consequence followed. Chinua, force majeure, began to shift out of my orbit. He discovered, as his friends did too, that he had been drawn onto a world stage – to all of humanity, and not just to a narrow circle of friends and admirers. 

He was, as I have dared to proclaim elsewhere, the best writer of English that I think I have ever read. He is, for me, its most mellifluous exponent. If the reader disagrees with this spectacular claim, I plead that beauty is in the beholder’s eye. I speak for myself and, perhaps, for a continent. There is no writer, living or dead, who has demonstrated, in greater measure than Chinua, the ability to weave a tapestry of words taken from the Queen’s English and from the proverbs and aphorisms of his own mother tongue, Igbo.  

 He certainly rose above the British colonial quagmire to which our people were condemned for a century and more, to write the language of Chaucer, Shakespeare, Milton, Dickens, Stevenson and, yes, even Conrad, with a mastery that takes the breath away. When we were reading those authors, in high school and in college, we did not think – we dared not think – that we would produce a Chinua Achebe. Later, he was to pick a bone or two with Conrad’s racially slanted writings, but that is another story!                                                                          

I might have sometimes been tempted to look at Chinua, and think (again, Biblically): Is this not the carpenter’s son? But I can say, truthfully, that I never succumbed to that temptation. He bestrode my world like the colossus that he was, and I rejoiced with him as he scaled the heights of literature to its pinnacle. No, he was no mere carpenter’s son for me. During the years Chinua and I were in high school and university, my contacts with the senior Achebe were few and far between. My memory of him is, at best, very sketchy now. But Chinua’s old man was no carpenter, though I have no doubt that he was largely responsible for chiseling Chinua, in his formative years, into the exquisite product that has dazzled the world for more than half a century, since THINGS FALL APART was published in 1958.  

 Chinua should have won the Nobel Prize for Literature. The Nobel Prize committee members are probably the only persons, on earth, who know why he was denied this recognition of his literary stature, and of his influence on more than two or three generations of African writers. And on other writers worldwide! Tony Morrison (the Nobel laureate) acknowledged Chinua as one of her main literary inspirations in writing about her own people. Chinua’s most celebrated contemporary and fellow Nigerian writer, Wole Soyinka, the 1986 Nobel laureate, also acknowledged Chinua as a trail-blazer. Enough said!       

Chinua now belongs to the ages, his work on earth magnificently done. No one could have asked for more from even a genius of his breath-taking dimensions. Regrettably, Chinua had to live out the last twenty-three years of his life wheelchair-bound – the result of a vehicular accident in 1990. This is the reason, above all else, that my wife, Ethel and I (and Chinua’s other friends) are especially appreciative of the love and devotion of Odozi-ngwulu, his beautiful wife, Professor Dr. Christiana Achebe – Ana to Chinua himself, Christie to the rest of us!  My appreciation also extends to their children, Chinelo, Ike, Chidi and Nwando, of whom one is a medical doctor, and the other three achieved doctorates in academia. Apropos of this, Ethel sometimes teasingly told Chinua he was the least educated member of his family!! I was his best-man when he married Christie, and he was godfather to my son, Chukwudi (Chidi).  

 His last book, THERE WAS A COUNTRY – the story of Biafra, and of man’s inhumanity to man – was like a concluding and thunderous exclamation mark on his life as a writer!! The buzz it generated has scarcely died down, as I write this.   

I stand, in humility, in the shadow of his greatness and, yes, of his almost Biblical stature!!! In the language of the Bard, when comes such another?

ARLINGTON, TX 
April 2013 

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This article was sent to this blog by an associate of the writer

Office Bullies

By Moses Obroku

If you haven’t experienced working under a cantankerous, highly irritable, generally obnoxious boss, believe me, fate has been extremely kind to you as you have been spared one of life’s greatest trauma. To the people whose lot in life it is right now to be working with such bosses, I can only hope that something happens about that situation real soon before permanent damage is done to whatever is left of your dignity.

*Moses Obroku

And as you know too well by now, this special breed that your boss is, do not need any external stimulus for him/her to get real nasty with you. On their own, they can generate a negative energy minefield to ensure your every work day of the week is unbearable for you.

Often times, they create unnecessary tension around them at the work place. They seem to hold this twisted view that the boss has to be stern looking with this ‘don’t –joke-with me’, ‘I -am- tough’ kind of disposition; like that is when they can command respect quickly. These bosses do not realize that when subordinates work with the apprehension of being given verbal jabs indiscriminately, they end up making more mistakes as the fear of what is anticipated soon materializes.

The most amazing thing is that, these kinds of bosses almost never give a word of commendation to their subordinates, even when such subordinates have performed extremely well on the job or saved the department some embarrassment.  Such achievements sadly, usually go unacknowledged. But when these same champions make little mistakes, a barrage of verbal missiles are hauled at them.

You just never know with these kinds of bosses.  Whatever you do, you will end up being wrong. If you get proactive, it will be deemed you are taking decisions without authorization. If you get reactive, you will be judged for being slow or negligent. It is generally a lose -lose situation for the subordinate. If you do, you will be blamed. If you don’t, you will be blamed. These bosses are plainly double edge swords; either way they swing you will be cut to pieces. And the way they talk down on subordinates is unimaginable. Often times, they will leave the real issue on hand and start attacking your personality. They may even take it to your home or upbringing, leaving you defenseless as you swallow it whole, humiliation and all.

By the time they are done with verbally bullying you, whatever self-esteem you may have gone to work with is usually left in shreds, leaving you feeling inadequate and sorry for yourself. I have seen full grown men reduced to fervent sobs when they are being lampooned, over misunderstanding a directive. 

 (pix:workrelationships)

But I ask myself, is all that necessary? Why should a subordinate get walked all over just so a point can be made, when there is a more humane way of addressing the issue whilst letting that junior colleague keep his/her dignity?  But why am I not surprised at the way these superiors act? That is what bullies do. They pick on you because you are regarded as the weak one. As it concerns the office, you cannot talk back because they are your superiors. If you do, it will be deemed ‘rudeness to superiors’, if not ‘insubordination’. So, latching on their corporate advantageous positions, they scream at you, rain invectives, if they think you deserve it. There is no sparing what they can say to you. They simply revel in the fact that you cannot talk back, or shouldn’t. 

The bosses who treat their subordinates badly, ironically almost never apologize or own up to ever making mistakes. They think they are as close to perfection as mankind can get. In their delusion, even when they make shameful mistakes, they will insist they are right and their gigantic egos would prevent them from acknowledging it, let alone apologizing. They are in sync with the saying that ‘the queen can do no wrong’ and they strongly remind me of the tyrant ‘comrade Napoleon’ in George Orwell’s ‘Animal Farm’ ‘who is always right’. Otherwise, how does one explain the infallible position they always assume? 

When shown very obviously embarrassing mistakes they have made by subordinates who would have used high degree of politeness in doing so, these ‘high and mighty’ managers would sometimes go on the offensive, blaming that junior colleague as the cause of that mistake or contributing to it. You need to experience this behavior to fully understand what I mean here. And when this happens, such subordinate is left with his confidence eroded and regret in doing what he thought was right.

When bosses vacillate in approbating and reprobating, demonstrating high erratic behavior in the office in dealing with people they manage, frankly, from an objective point of view, the only message they succeed in passing across is that they are borderline cases of extreme megalomania and ridiculousness.

Unfortunately, top management hardly ever knows about these behaviors, as most establishments don’t have a system of ‘feedback’ in place, where employees can make these abuses known.

While I am not a psychology major, I suspect that most bully bosses have deep seated personal health or family issues that are plaguing them. Their unsuspecting subordinates are just ready subjects to vent on, so they can feel the power once again that whatever is plaguing them is robbing them off.

Another explanation I can offer about their behavior is obsessive fear. They fear failure in carrying out their responsibilities as unit, divisional or group heads.so they drive themselves hard and subordinates twice as hard. Nobody wants to lose a position already attained for lack of performance; but I think it should not be at unbearable cost to the people that serve under them. 

A boss will say, ‘we need this job done on this deadline’. After the people involved have stayed extra hours and almost killed themselves to meet up with such deadlines, to their dismay, such task that was announced as ‘so urgent’ would still be lying around the boss’ table many days afterwards. What is that? Why make me close so late and endanger me on Nigerian roads with all their attendant risks at unreasonable hours only for the so-called ‘deadline’ not to be urgent anymore?

Sometimes I feel sorry for the bosses. It must really be hard for them, balancing their top positions with family and the other myriads of issues confronting them. But I am also certain they can make their points clearly and firmly without all the drama of shouting, name calling people, and generally creating tension at work places; or even going about threatening subordinates with scoring them low during appraisals! 

One thing that is not common in this part of the world now is anger management classes.  Quite frankly, people managers who have a proclivity for losing their cool over small stuffs should enroll. To be sure, most bosses ought to keep having refresher courses on anger management and advanced certification on civilized conduct, before they start collapsing from stroke resulting from unnecessary tension and excess brain activity during shouting sessions with junior colleagues.

But what can be done about these hard to please bosses, or is one condemned to stomach all these insults for as long as you remain under them? I think not.

You can start by getting your act together. Step up your competence level; be at your optimum in the level of work you churn out. Do quality work. Will this keep your fault finding boss off your back? Of course not! But it will prepare you for the next step to reclaiming your dignity at your work place - which is ‘going on a diplomatic offensive’. It is taking the talk to your boss, and you must be ready to lead the charge! Martin Luther King said freedom is never given voluntarily by the oppressor. It must be demanded by the oppressed. To reclaim your right to be treated   like a human being, you will have to demand it.

A warning though: there is absolutely no guarantee that your boss will appreciate that kind of talk. It may not change anything. As a matter of fact, his/her behavior towards you may take a turn for the worse. You may come off this adventure vigorously battered. But you would have made the point. Your boss will discover something new about you that, you are the one who will not take the blows lying down anymore. And because you have stepped up your work, the boss will not have a reason to nail you. You will eventually get your dignity restored.

But after you have done all and the situation does not improve, do not despair. You will have to endure until you or your boss leaves that unit or establishment. Afteral, it is properly called a ‘work place’. Not a ‘social gathering’ of friends. 

At the moment, I am very fortunate to have a very excellent boss. He is exceptional in how he treats people who work with him, from the drivers to the colleagues in management staff. He doesn’t bring anyone down. A very striking observation I made is the fact that, even though he jokes with everyone and tries to make the work place as lively as possible, we know not to mess with him or try to take him for granted; because, like a true scorpion, my boss can also sting with deadly consequence. I like to think office bullies can learn how to manage men and materials from him. A word is enough for the wise… let it be.

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Mr. Obroku, a legal practitioner contributed this piece to this blog from Lagos;mosesobroku@gmail.com

Who Needs Patricia Etteh’s House?

 By Ugochukwu Ejinkeonye 

Not long after the N628 million contract scandal involving the leadership of the House of Representatives exploded in the face of Nigerians, Vanguard newspaper (August 29, 2007) carried an interview with Dino Melaye, the Chairman of the House Committee on Information and National Orientation. Mr. Melaye who has unduly advertised himself as one of the loudest supporters of the House Speaker, Mrs. Patricia Bunmi Etteh, in her current travails, had, in the course of the interview, startled Nigerians with a very loaded and overly distasteful statement that spoke volumes about the quality of minds that “make laws” for Nigerians at the nation’s Lower Legislative House.

Said Melaye: “This woman [Etteh] told us, on the floor of the House, that she’s got two boobs. That the old [House Members] can suck one while the new would suck one. Honestly speaking, we are sucking. We are enjoying the sucking. We are doing that right now.”

* Ms. Patricia Etteh

It is now several weeks since Melaye gave this interview. In the absence of any form of refutation from the beautician from Ikire and her handlers, despite the very unflattering insinuations and disquieting imagery the choice of words clearly convey, one is at liberty to conclude that Melaye may have used the exact words deployed by Madam Speaker to serve her very generous offer to House Members. If then the language of deliberations in the hallowed chambers of the National Assembly has achieved such a low descent, why then should anyone be surprised that House Members could so easily provoke serious envy in motor park touts and area boys by the kind of disgraceful and self-debasing combat they enacted the other day?

Last week, the panel investigating the outrageous house renovation contract submitted its findings, and as they clearly conveyed in their report, Madam Speaker grossly abused her office in several instances and copiously lied to the panel. Calls for her resignation or impeachment, which started ringing out from several quarters before and in the course of the sitting of the panel, have become even more loud, impatient and widespread.

By their actions and utterances, what is clear is that Etteh and her supporters are blissfully unaware of the depth of public disaffection and resentment this scandal has attracted to the Speaker and her House, and so are still fighting with all their strength even after the battle had been lost and won. For her, it is all about surviving and clinging on to the privileges of an office she is pitiably ill-equipped for, despite the heavy, crippling moral burden that now go with it.

The ordinary Nigerian out there, who can neither afford even a leaking roof over his head nor one decent meal a day is seething with rage that the Speaker and her motley crowd, no matter what they call themselves, the offices they occupy, or of what use they imagine they are to Nigerians, could muster the effrontery to seek to squander such a huge amount of money just to renovate a house! What this means is that even if due process was duly followed, and provision for the renovation clearly made in the budget, this category of Nigerians would still have been calling for the head of the Speaker and her deputy for seeking to impoverish them further. Such an expenditure profile can only represent one excellent way of advertising crude insensitivity and delusion of grandeur.

Now let’s look at the matter through the eye of the ordinary Nigerian who now sees Etteh and her supporters as a gaggle of heartless fellows hell-bent on prolonging his suffering. In present-day Nigeria (2007), N2.5 million or much less (depending on who is building) can comfortably put up a three-bedroom bungalow. So, with N628 million, one would be hoping to get nothing less than 251 houses. That, to me, should constitute an estate, which would settle the accommodation problems of 251 families or more.

 *Dino Melaye

 In her testimony, Etteh had claimed that what was allocated for the renovation of her house was merely N238 million. Well, that amount can build an estate comprising 95 bungalows or more. Now, long-suffering Nigerians out there are asking: What makes the Speaker of the House of Representatives so special that Nigeria would use the money that could offer “comfortable” accommodation to more than 250 or even 95 Nigerians to merely renovate her house?

That is what they are insisting to know, and I will be glad if somebody could step forward to answer this. That this question has remained unanswered is worsening their pain. Indeed, this is the same country where civil servants (performing duties as important (or even more) as what the Speaker does) are being mass-sacked for daring to ask for N9,000 minimum wage. 

This is the same country where it has been established that more than 70% of the citizenry live below poverty level. By the way, how much was used to build the house in the first place? Nigerians need to know. We have been treated to wild tales about beddings costing N5million, “cluster of houses” being upgraded, and a chapel and mosque being constructed, as if the Speaker’s residence is an ecumenical centre. In 1999, this same house was renovated at the cost of N5.28 million, while N2.5 million and N16 million were invested to further work on it in 2003 and 2006 (that is, last year) respectively. The nation has also been informed that the house was horribly vandalized.

By the way, where is Mr. Aminu Bello Masari, the former Speaker of the House of Representatives? Is he not aware of all the insinuations flying around, appearing to hint at the possibility that he may have horribly vandalised the house before vacating it? Even if the Idoko panel did not deem it fit to invite him to tell Nigerians in what state he had left the house, is it not necessary for him to speak up immediately to clear his name, which is being gradually rubbished by the present scandal? Or has he forgotten that silence is one way of saying that one is guilty as charged?

Well, Etteh is saying that we should be grateful to her for saving us N244 million by refusing to stay in a hotel. Thanks, good lady! But may I inform you that by telling Nigerians that keeping you in Abuja for only 107 days would cost them a whopping sum of N244 million, you are clearly suggesting to them that you are a luxury they can ill-afford, in fact, a dispensable burden too heavy to bear. Yes, you are also drawing unhelpful attention to the cost of maintaining the National Assembly, and by extension, inspiring questions about the desirability of Nigeria continuing to have two Legislative Houses.

 *Nigeria's House Of Reps

Indeed, whatever merits and perceived benefits that made bicameral legislature attractive to Nigeria’s founding fathers is gradually being diminished by what we have come to know as “Nigerian factor”. What we have seen is that instead of the two Houses constituting moderating influences on each other, helping to refine and fine-tuning the legislative process, they appear to have rather conspired to short-change the Nigerian people. They appear to be united by only one obsession: squandermania and profligacy.

I am told that they even fund their frivolous foreign trips with state funds. The less their number, the better for the nation. So, what does Nigeria stand to lose if one House is abolished? Yes, let’s have one House, until it becomes necessary to add another one. For now, what we have is simply superfluous.

Going by Mr. Dino Melaye’s statement quoted earlier, Nigerians have every reason to worry about the quality of lawmaking that takes place on their behalf in Abuja. Can any sound legislation take place in a House where members are only interested in “sucking and enjoying?” Are we sure we are not stuck with a House that believes in nothing, stands for nothing, without any sense of history, and clearly has no plans of changing anything or achieving anything? So why should the nation continue to waste scarce resources maintaining an unwieldy House, which only idles away or engages in vulgar discourse at the nation’s expense in Abuja?

Well, whether Etteh resigns or is impeached now would hardly affect the opinion of many Nigerians about the National Assembly. Perhaps, Etteh and her House deserve each other. In it we have “honourable members” who are prepared to kill themselves with blows just to impress one woman accused of gross misconduct and abuse of office, but would not lose a sweat to fight for the welfare of those they claim to be representing in the House.

Because, we have such calibre of lawmakers, who are in the House “sucking and enjoying” and forgetting the very important assignment that brought them to Abuja, Etteh and her 'Chocolate Cream soldiers' (apologies Bernard Shaw)  can afford to flaunt their contempt for public opinion. As incensed Nigerians renewed their call for Etteh’s resignation, she caused a statement to be issued last weekend which practically told Nigerians to shut up, because, as non-members of her House of “Suckers and Enjoyers”, they are not qualified to comment on a matter in which their own money is involved.

 *Meanwhile A Nigerian Feeds From A Lagos Dustbin


The disdain in the statement is quite palpable: “The probe panel’s report has been laid on the table and what it contains are conclusions, not recommendations for punishment. One wonders when non-members of the House of Representatives started deciding how 360 members of the lower chambers run their affairs. What the procedure says is that the report will be debated when the House reconvenes after its two-week recess. It is therefore unfair and misleading for people to stay outside and tell 360 members of this honourable House what to do. It is like telling Nigerians that the people they elected cannot do the job.”

Well, Madam Speaker, we are sorry for daring to comment on a matter that concerns us. Very soon, your Honourable “suckling” members will return from recess, and after a another session of “sucking and enjoying”, they would tell us their verdict on the findings of the Idoko Panel. They might as well not bother. We have already realized the great mistake we made by taking them to Abuja to “enjoy and suck” on our behalf. 

And that mistake is correctable. The National Assembly must urgently shed its excess weight. Every Nigerian must join the campaign to commence this process. 

So, if the House Members are wise, they would quickly read the handwriting on the wall and make haste to reclaim their respectability and vindicate their relevance, before a thoroughly sickened and tired nation finds an effective way to dispense with them.
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First published in October 2007 in the now rested Weekly column SCRUPLES which appeared on the back page of Daily Independent every Wednesday 

New York Senate Passes Resolution On Chinua Achebe

J1186-2013: LEGISLATIVE RESOLUTION Mourning The Death Of Paramount Novelist Chinua Achebe, Founder And Pioneer Of African literature

 

 A Nigerian National Newspaper Reports
Achebe's Passing (pix:Ugochukwu Ejinkeonye (2013))
 
WHEREAS, It is the sense of this Legislative Body to pay tribute to the lives of those esteemed individuals of international renown who distinguished themselves through their life's work; and
WHEREAS, Foremost novelist, Professor Chinua Achebe, died on Thursday, March 21, 2013, at the age of 82; and 
WHEREAS, Born Albert Chinualumogu Achebe, on November 16, 1930,
Chinua Achebe was a Nigerian novelist, poet, professor, and critic; he was
best known for his 1958 novel, THINGS FALL APART, selling over 12 
million copies around the world, and having been translated into 50 languages, 
 making him the most paraphrased African writer of all time; and
WHEREAS, Raised by his parents in the Igbo town of Ogidi in southeastern
Nigeria, Chinua Achebe excelled academically and earned a scholar ship for 
undergraduate studies; he became fascinated with world religions and traditional
African cultures, and began writing stories as a college student; and




















Chinua Achebe


WHEREAS, After graduation, Chinua Achebe worked for the Nigerian
  Broadcasting Service (NBS) and soon moved to the metropolis of
 Lagos; he gained worldwide  attention for THINGS FALL APART;
  his later novels  include: NO LONGER AT EASE (1960), ARROW OF
GOD (1964), A MAN OF THE PEOPLE (1966), and ANTHILLS OF
THE SAVANNAH (1987); and
 WHEREAS, When the region of Biafra broke away from Nigeria in 1967, 
Chinua Achebe became  a supporter of Biafran independence and
acted as  ambassador for the people of the new nation; the war ravaged
  the populace, and as starvation and violence took its toll, he appealed
to the people of Europe and the Americas for assistance; and
WHEREAS, When the Nigerian government retook the region in 1970,
Chinua Achebe involved himself in political parties, but soon resigned 
due to frustration over the   corruption and elitism he witnessed, thereby
deciding  to devote himself to academia; he lived in the United States for 
several years in the 1970s, and returned there  in 1990 after a car accident
left him partially disabled; and 
WHEREAS, Chinua Achebe's novels focus on the traditions of Igbo society,
the effect of Christian influences, and the  clash of Western and traditional 
African values during  and after the colonial era; his style relies heavily on the Igbo oral  tradition, and combines straightforward   narration with 
representations of  folk stories, proverbs, and oratory; he also published a
number of short stories, children's books, and essay collections; and

New York Senate In Session
 

WHEREAS, A David and Marianna Fisher  University   Professor and  

Professor of Africana Studies at Brown University, Chinua Achebe worked up
until the time of  his death; and 
WHEREAS, New York's Bard College, with a distinguished history of
supporting Chinua Achebe's work and legacy, will continue to be a primary
home for his projects; and 
WHEREAS, Professor Achebe's global significance lies not only in his talent
and recognition as a writer, but also as a critical thinker and essayist who has
written extensively on questions of the role of culture in Africa along with the
social  and political significance of aesthetics and analysis of the postcolonial
state in Africa; and 
WHEREAS, Chinua Achebe distinguished himself in his profession and by 
his sincere dedication and substantial  contribution to the welfare of his
community; and 
WHEREAS, Chinua Achebe's commitment to excellence, and his spirit
of humanity, carried over into all fields of  enterprise, including charitable
 and civic endeavors; and

With Its Recent Translation Into Persian,

 Things Fall Apart Can Now Be Read In 60

Major Languages 

WHEREAS, Chinua Achebe is survived by his wife, Christie,  their children,
Chinelo, Ikechukwu, Chidi, and Nwando as  well as his grandchildren, Chochi,
Chino, Chidera, C.J. (Chinua Jr.), Nnamdi and Zeal; and 
WHEREAS, Armed   with a humanistic spirit and imbued with a sense of 
compassion, Chinua Achebe leaves behind a legacy which will long endure
the passage of time and will remain as a comforting memory to all he served
and befriended; now, therefore, be it
RESOLVED, That this Legislative Body pause in its deliberations to mourn
the death of paramount novelist  Chinua Achebe, founder and pioneer of
African literature; and be it further 
RESOLVED, That a copy of this Resolution, suitably engrossed, be
transmitted to the family of Chinua Achebe.

------------------------

NYSenate